Wednesday, May 1, 2013

WWDD---What Would Darcy Do?

Is it a sign that I have spent too much time in Jane Austen Land (is that possible?) when I am standing at the airport gate looking at the mass of humanity and thinking "I wonder what Mr. Darcy would think of all this?" And Viola! A new feature for my blog was born.

Okay...it's a new blog so pretty much everything is a new feature, but humor me here.

Today's inaugural installment of WWDD---What Would Darcy Do on an airplane?

Of course, he'd fly first class. And he most certainly would not be one of those people who cram all their belongings into a carry on bag and jam it into the overhead compartment. So unseemly.

He would not partake of the free alcohol in first class and he most certainly would not flirt with the flight attendants.

In all likelihood, he would be the man who closes his eyes and pretends he's asleep in order to avoid any conversation.

The more I thought about this scenario, the more the other characters from Pride and Prejudice appeared in the scene which now looks something like this:

"I dearly love to fly, is it not the most invigorating experience?" The eager faced man took his seat next to Mr. Darcy who did his best to be polite without encouraging further discourse. Undaunted, the other man put out his hand in a manner which required a response from Darcy. "I'm Chuck, Chuck Bingley. Just love flying. On my way to a sales conference. My father died and left me the business and now I'm learning the ropes." 

"I am sorry to hear about your father," Mr. Darcy said and turned to look out the window. 

"Pops was quite a guy. I just hope I can do as good a job with the business as he did." 

"So, you're in trade?" Darcy turned back from the window and examined his seatmate. 

"Trade, buy, sell. We do it all." 

"Fresh from the oven cookies, gentlemen?" A flight attendant with vibrant eyes and a name tag that said "Liz" presented a tray of gooey confections in front of Mr. Darcy and his new, unwanted, friend. 

"They appear tolerable, but not enough to tempt me," Mr. Darcy said. 

"Upon my word, man, I would not be as fastidious as you for a kingdom. I've never seen such temptations." Chuck Bingley said reaching for a chocolate chip and a Snickerdoodle which he gobbled with delight and washed down with an enthusiastic gulp of milk. 

Liz, the flight attendant observed all of this without speaking further, then turned away, though Darcy could swear he heard her giggle once she returned to the galley. 


Oh...I must stop. This is too much fun!

What do you think? Who else is on the plane? Imagine Mrs. Bennet in the seat behind them. Or Lydia and Wickham trying to join the Mile High Club?




2 comments:

  1. lol! Pride and Prejudice and Planes! My mind spends an inordinate amount of time in Jane Austen Land, too, so I often think WWDD or WWLD? If Mrs Bennet and Lydia and Wickham were on there, too, I think he would have a free drink or five, even if it wasn't top-shelf stuff.

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    1. Monica---Thanks for stopping by! I think you are my most frequent visitor. :)

      Definitely. Wickham would drink the leftovers out of other's drinks. EWWW.

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